Sunday skipping

Well I'm pretty convinced that my weight will be up for tomorrow's weigh-in (in fact it would be a miracle if it wasn't!) I know that as the week went on my resolve got weeker, so it's no surprise really. I guess maybe I'll go back on phase one for a week to 're-set' my body.
I did get to do a bit of skipping today, but only 50 jumps, and that was whilst dodging between raindrops!

The problem with skipping ropes

is that you can't skip if it rains all day. Especially if you are as tall as me and there's no way you could skip\jump rope inside without causing endless amounts of damage to all the things around you.

An assortmet of thoughts

I've been away longer than I had planned to be gone, so I'll have to try to get you all up to date. On my Christmas day weigh-in I was actually down 1lb to 268.8. However I think I may have put on a couple of pounds over the last couple of days. I was doing ok, but several days in a row of Christmas celebrations my resolve was worn down a bit, and by yesterday when we visited my Dad's parents I was pretty much just eating whatever was put in front of me. However although I wasn't sticking properly to south beach I wasn't eating to excess, which I#'m sure I've done in the past. Hopefully I'll get back to the diet over the next couple of days, and by the time I get back to work it'll be automatic again.

Hmmm, I received a skipping rope for Christmas. I wasn't feeling brilliant from boxing day onwards - the family cold had got me, giving me a sore throat and glands as well as the snuffles. However today I took it out the box and gave it a go. Now I know my fitness level is not at a high at the moment, so I'm aiming to just build up the amount I can skip in one go. I did 5o jumps (not straight, as I can only seem to do about 8 or 9 in a row, but in a session) and then HP did the same. I did a second fifty, and then escaped back indoors to take my asthma inhaler! However, I did do another 80 about an hour later, so that's 180 altogether today. I've no idea if that's good, or quite how I should be going about it, but it felt good - my heart was certainly pumping faster and I got pretty warm doing it! If anyone has any ideas of how to build it up, or extend what I'm doing, then please let me know.

In other news, I have now switched to the new blogger, so hopefully everything will continue to work ok....!

My job

Sorry people, I haven't said much about my job and what happened in the meetings and stuff. That's cos I'm still trying to work out how I feel about it all. Part of me really wanted to say to them that since my contract ended at the end of the year I wouldn't be returning after Christmas. However, I never quite got round to saying that (the sickness bug got in the way somewhat). I did agree with the headteacher that I could continue childminding the little boy two days a week, so at least I'll be keeping the bit of the week that keeps me sane.

I am going to be changing what I do with the one of the two children I work with - doing some more individual work out of the class (as he is quite far behind the other children, and needs to go back to the basics). And I think I've managed to come up with a balance between totally taking him out of the classroom (Headteacher's idea) and only working with him in class to try to access the work the rest of the class are doing (class teacher's idea). We'll see how that goes.
One sad thing is that the lady who was the other classroom assistant (and the person who made the job bearable) has retired, so we'll be having someone new in the new year. Hopefully I'll get on ok with the new person.

That's about all I can think of about it at the minute and I have to go wrap presents. I'll try to post more about it once I start back in the new year - I plan to try to forget all about it over the holiday!

Monday Weigh-in

Haven't done one of these for a few weeks. Probably because of being stuck pretty much in the same place (I went up, up, down but only little amounts so far as I can remember). However all that changed this week. I was back on phase one of the beach, and have lost at least a pound by Wednesday night. That was when I came down with a horrible sickness bug. I was back to eating normally by the weekend, but at my weigh in today I was down 9.4 to 269.8. Which is a total weight loss of 24.2lb.

I'm sick

sick sick sick, and then sick again. Didn't go to work today, and won't be going tomorrow either. The up side is that I just weighed myself (yes, I am a bit obsessive about it) and I currently weigh my lowest for a long time. However, personally I'd have stuck to the beach than having to go through this. Not sure when I'll be back, but in case you were missing me thought I'd better explain.

Knowing that people care really helps.

I was going to title this post "don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo", but having thought about it, that title would just be wrong in so many ways.
For a start, I didn't give it a capital letter, and that would be bad, very bad.
Secondly, I don't want to give anyone the impression that I'm about to hang myself - that would be very far from the truth, so please no-body panic.

This weekend I've been to the Saturday morning prayer meeting that our church has, and then a church training meeting, and then to church this morning. At each of these there have been people that have asked me "How are you?" in a way that showed they actually wanted to hear the answer - they weren't just asking for the sake of asking. Although I probably haven't expressed to them just how down I've been feeling, I've been able to share a little bit of the stresses that are going on in my life. And time after time I've heard them say those special words "I'll be praying for you", and I know that they meant it. It's really been such a blessing to know that people do care.

I can't say that everything is sorted yet, but I know that I've got people on my side, and that all I can do is go into the meeting tomorrow moring and say what I've got to say. God already knows what the outcome will be, I've just got to trust him on that.

I've decided that I want to say that I don't want to continue at the school after Christmas (that is, I don't want my contract to be renewed). I've no idea quite how the headteacher will respond to that, but we'll see...

Everything looks bleak

I'm so tired. Not just a physical tiredness, although I can hardly keep my eyes open, but a mental tiredness too. I've had enough, stop the world and let me off for a bit.

I'm off to bed soon, hopefully before 8pm, and that ought to help the physical tiredness. But I don't know what do to about the blank nothing inside my head. I feel like I'm living my life through some sort of emotion stopping machine. Life happens, but I don't feel anything, just nothingness. Perhaps it's my body's way of trying to shut off from the stresses with my job and stuff, I just don't know.

I think I'd better go to bed, but I'll try to post more tomorrow.